Social Voyeurism

{Defining Privacy} 

Believe it or not, I'm a no holds-barred kind of girl.  {Sarcasm intended}  It's true, whether verbally and emotionally I tend to throw reservations aside and worry about consequences later, and sometimes it gets me into T-R-O-U-B-L-E!  

I seriously admire those that have the ability to live privately and without fanfare keeping things close to the cuff, treasuring their thoughts and memories for themselves.  Being in on their loop is even more special when it happens.  However, as public as I am, this kind of quietness in others can be somewhat frustrating when it comes to communication.

Feeling like you are part of someone's life is a special feeling, and being able to witness what's going on in the lives of the people I love with the convenience of social networking sites, it has become that much more simple to keep tabs with what is going on and feel a part of something bigger than myself and my small domain.  But when it seems that you're the only one making any effort towards public displays it's a little disconcerting.  Privacy seems to be the new rage in a time while Big Brother thrives all around us.  

How public is too public?  

It's okay for all of us to want to be social voyeurs, but there's gotta be something good to look at!

Reflections, Revelations and Resolutions

{Happy New Year!} 

With the fresh start we are so graciously granted in our minds each New Year, we have the opportunity to reflect on our previous year, and decide what goals we have for the coming 365 days.  I'm not one to make the traditional New Year's Resolutions like "lose weight" or "read more" that often fizzle out by the end of February, but this year after much self reflection and observation and inspiration, I have come to only one conclusion: I am the only one that can prevent my happiness, so in 2011 my resolution is to not stand in the way of my true happiness, but to offer it encouragement.

Overall, the later part of my twenties have been years of profound growth; each year I learn a bit more about who I am, what I stand for, and what I will tolerate.  At times I have felt like the victim of someone else's negative energy, doomed to suffer in order to make it out on the other side.  With a little inspiration from a great quote from a movie, I've learned that the moral of the story is, "It's not the power of the curse, it's the power you give the curse".

I reserve the right to the following curse-debilitating choices:

•  remove myself from the toxic influence of everything that would attempt to bring me down.

•  say Sianara! to the Negative Nancy's, and all of the influences effecting my choice of a positive state of mind or cause me to doubt myself.  

• pursue my dreams, and let nothing stand in my way.  

•  say Welcome! to my supporters, cohorts and the positive energy and love that really is surrounding me.  

I am the only one that can control what it is I chose to focus on, and the outcome of the choices I make.

Likewise, I have learned yet again that good friends are hard to come by, and therefore all the more worth keeping.  I will support and love them the way they do me, be a loyal, listening ear of comfort when times are challenging, and a positive light of inspiration whenever I can!  I have the wonderful ability to choose who will influence me, and the wonderful people that are a part of my life today make life that much more special, memorable, and joyful.  My next step is to just keep going, all the while finding ways to demonstrate my gratitude for all those and that which I have been blessed.

This natural high on life has been an active, yet easy choice, and declaring it aloud I hope will keep me accountable.  I am starting afresh in 2011, rising even higher, reaching for those dreams and goals, treasuring all that I have and those that I love... those that keep me grounded, make me laugh, keep me sane, and inspire me!

Here's to a new start and a refreshed perspective!  xx

Blessings In Disguise

{Perception is based on the Individual}

 

The funny thing about blessings in disguise is that you never can prepare yourself ahead of time to be on the look-out for challenging times ahead.  Hind-sight will always be 20-20.  When faced with tough circumstances, and difficult choices, life can seem impossible... being able to look beyond your current feelings, inconceivable.

But then you emerge from the blinding storm, finding yourself somehow victorious, and able to see clearly all that has occurred.  Peaks and valleys - we all endure great highs and lows, but it is what you choose to do in the valleys of your life that defines you, and builds your character.

The past six months have been challenging on many fronts.  Friendships have been trying, dreams beginning to take flight have been swatted down by neigh-sayers.  Challenging months, yes, but life experience has taught me that good things come to good people that are patient.  So, despite the bouts with depression, stemming from my own self-doubt, coupled with negative energy spewing from others, I tried my best to not get sucked into the storm, rising above to forgive those that have intentionally, or unintentionally hurt me.

As a child, I was taught that being sorry is not a complete process without sincerely asking for forgiveness.  Same goes for forgiveness.  Saying "I forgive you" means nothing to the person you've forgiven if you are continually reminded of your wrongs, or even treated in a different manner!  Recognizing that some are not capable of ever truly forgetting harms done to them, sometimes we must turn a blind eye when we are reminded of our painful pasts.  Social terrorism, however, is completely unacceptable.

A social terrorist deliberately goes out of their way to make others' feel terrible about themselves, for no apparent reason, other than to get back at those they feel have harmed them.  Whether this behavior stems from a place of insecurity, I do not know, but I've known a few of these social terrorists in my short life... and am certain I'll encounter a few more before my days are over.  I wish I could avoid them like the plague!

Social Terrorists aren't always recognizable upfront.  Some disguise themselves as helpful acquaintances, others you can know for years before you recognize the spectrum of their true colors.  Some will even act like decent, trustworthy people, until they turn on you the second they begin to believe you are a foe.  Worse yet, some will even try to turn others against you too, convincing the weak-minded, and bullying the strong-minded into believing their lies.

Convince themselves all they like, I am not the bad guy.  I have never truly deserved any of the censure any social terrorist has bestowed upon me.  When did "eye for an eye" ever become okay?  I don't agree with this hurtful behavior, so, try as they might, the social terrorists I have encountered in my life have all but disappeared from my radar.  I have chosen remove myself from their toxic influence, without drama, if I can avoid it.  Sometimes the web they have woven is so complex, their hold is not so easily escaped, but I believe that once the truth is realized, those that are under the influence of said social terrorist will come around, if you continue to take the high road.

I am so blessed with relationships and friendships that will stand the test of time, and the warfare of social terrorists.  These friends will always be few and far between, and all the more cherished.  I know that these people love me for who I am, accept me at my worst, appreciate my blatancy, and have patience for my mess-ups.  All I need to do now is remind myself that I have this faith in them when factors come into play that challenge our trust and love.  All the hardship can sometimes be a blessing, sometimes in disguise.